The following summaries are a few selected samples of real California Family Law cases (catogorized by county), in which children are taken away from safe parents, and forced to live with abusive parents.
When these children were four, seven and nine years old, they were taken from their mother who was accused of non-evidentiary Parent Alienation Syndrome, and placed in the full custody of their father. This occurred in 1996, after the two girls disclosed molest by their father, despite corroborative medical evidence, explicit disclosures of abuse to law enforcement, and receipt of California Victims of Crime funding for therapy due to the crime committed against them. They had a cluster of symptoms indicative of sexual abuse, including nightmares, encopresis, excessive fears, sexualized behavior, depression, dissociation, anger, physical pains, headaches, constipation, and stomach aches. The mother, found by the court to be a good, loving mother and not accused of any crime, has been on supervised visitation since the reversal of custody three years ago. The mother, bankrupt after spending $250,000, must represent herself in court against the father's attorney. The children's attorney functions as a de facto attorney for the accused perpetrator.
Contra Costa County
After disclosing molest by her father, this 11-year-old victim and her two siblings were forced to continue overnight, unsupervised visits with the identified perpetrator. The father admitted molesting his daughter and was convicted. Nevertheless, overnight visits were court ordered to continue. In 1997 the five-year-old daughter disclosed molest by the father. Unsupervised visits continued because the court determined the father was not able to pay a supervisor.
El Dorado County
In 1998 this 4-year-old boy was taken from his mother and given to his physically abusive father. He is barred from any contact from his mother.
This little girl, born in 1994, was taken away from her mother when she was a toddler, and placed with her father, despite her on-going disclosures of sexual abuse by the father. She had a cluster of symptoms indicative of sexual abuse including anger, phobias, eating problems, insomnia, constipation, headaches, nausea, regression, terror when her diapers were changed, night terrors, and attention problems. These problems increased when she was placed with the father, but the numerous reports to CPS have been to no avail. The child cries until she vomits when she leaves her mother on week-end visits and is forced to return to the father.
Los Angeles/Orange County (Torrance)
Born in 1988, this little girl was placed in the custody of her mother when she was five years old, seeing her violent father only in the presence of a court monitor. When she was seven, she was forced to see her father without a supervisor, and reported to professionals that he was sexually and physically abusing her. The abuse was corroborated by medical evidence. She had a cluster of symptoms indicative of sexual abuse including nightmares, night terrors, enuresis, encopresis, excessive fears of her mother dying, depression, suicide attempt, eating disorder, extreme dissociation, intense anger, flashbacks, physical pains, headaches, insomnia, nausea, diarrhea, constipation, stomach aches, and a learning disability. Rather than protecting her, Judge F. granted primary custody to her father. In Utah, where her mother had moved, physical and sexual abuse was substantiated and she received complete court protection. However, California regained jurisdiction and placed her with the father. The child, now 11, is only able to see her non-offending mother for 8 hours per month under supervised conditions.
These two children, a boy born in 1982 and a girl born in 1984, were in the full custody of their mother who was a victim of domestic violence. In 1989 and 1990, both children disclosed sexual abuse by the father. They had a cluster of symptoms indicative of sexual abuse, including lack of intact hymen, vaginal infections, nightmares and night terrors, enuresis and encopresis, phobias, sexualized behavior, depression, eating disorders, intense anger, headaches, and stomach aches. The mother was charged by the State of Georgia for not protecting the children from the father. The children received California Victims of Crime funding for therapy due to the crimes committed against them. However, in 1990 the California court took the children away from their mother and put them with the father's family. The mother was placed on supervised visitation. In 1992 the father gained custody and hid the children from their mother. $36,000 back child support owed to the mother was erased, and the court doubled her payments of child support. In 1997 the mother was assaulted and injured in the courthouse by the father, who continued to terrorize her. The mother, a court monitor herself, was chosen "1995 Humanitarian of the Year" by her university.
Los Angeles County Superior Court
Born in 1987, this child began masturbating at school and reported sexual abuse by her father when she was seven years old. The Department of Children and Family Court Services (DCFS) concluded she had been sexually abused. She was placed in the custody of her mother, and saw her father on court-ordered supervised visits. The child repeatedly asked to be placed with her mother and consistently reported sexual molest by her father, even in court. Nevertheless, in she was taken away from her non-abusive mother and placed in the custody of her father on the recommendation of an evaluator. In 1994 DCFS filed another sexual-abuse petition against the father in juvenile court. However, the child remained in the custody of her father, despite having a court-appointed attorney who does not represent the wishes of the child. In 1998, the court cut off her off from all contact with her non-offending mother. Currently this severely learning-disabled child is allowed to see her mother only twice a week under supervised conditions. The mother is now bankrupt.
Los Angeles/Riverside County (Torrance Superior Court)
This child was raised by her mother who has never been accused of any crime. In 1998 she was taken away from her mother and legal father, and forced to live with a man whom she has continuously stated sexually abused her. She is allowed no contact with her mother, who has tried unsuccessfully to protect her.
Los Angeles County
This two-year-old girl disclosed sexual abuse by father, and was given to identified abuser. The mother is on supervised visits.
These small children were placed in the custody of their mother when they were nearly one and two years old. Their violent father was ordered to take a parenting class. A year later they were taken away from their mother and forced to live with their father. The judge stated he was only interested in the mother's "alienation" (the mother was breast-feeding), and ignored police reports of the father's domestic violence and history of DUI's. The unemployed mother is ordered to pay child support of over $1200 per month to the multi-millionaire Israeli father (who obtained a green card through their marriage). The toddlers are being raised to speak only Hebrew and are only allowed scant contact with their mother, who cannot afford an attorney.
Born in 1990, this child made graphic disclosures of rape by his father, including group sex, to physicians, therapists, and detectives. He had a cluster of symptoms indicative of sexual abuse including sexualized behavior, depression, suicide attempt, eating disorder, extreme dissociation, intense anger, physical pains, headaches, insomnia, nausea, diarrhea, constipation, stomach aches, learning disability and attention problems. CPS did not protect him. The child's attorney did not represent the child's wishes. Despite saying that he wanted to live with his mother, he was forced to live with his identified perpetrator who then moved to Boston. He is rarely allowed to see his mother, and only with a supervisor.
Born in 1989, this child was taken from his mother after he disclosed that his father beat him when he was 4 years old. There was medical evidence of abuse. The child had a cluster of symptoms indicative of sexual abuse, including sexualized behaviors, depression, intense anger, nightmares and night terrors, headaches, stomach aches, bladder problems and enuresis, diarrhea, phobias, and attention problems. The boy stated he wanted to live with his mother, and instead was forced to live with his father. The child's attorney does not represent the wishes of the child. The non-offending mother has spent approximately $85,000 and must represent herself in court.
Los Angeles (Long Beach and Concord)
This four-year-old child lived with his mother and 3 brothers in Long Beach after his parents separated in 1997. When the mother decided to move to Northern California, the judge ordered the child delivered to Southern California every week for visits in 1998. An evaluator recommended a change of custody to the father, despite the mother complying with the visitation schedule.
This little girl reported sexual abuse, corroborated by 4 medical reports, by her father who physically abused and choked her mother unconscious. She was placed in the custody of her mother, a bank vice president, and saw her father only under supervised conditions. The father threatened and stalked them until the mother and child took refuge in a battered women's shelter. The child was forced to visit her father without supervision, and was subsequently re-abused. Her mother was court-ordered not to take her to the doctor. The mother fled with her daughter to Europe in 1992, because she could not obtain protection for the child through California family law court. They were found 1˝ years later, and the child was placed in the full custody of her father. Her mother went to prison for depriving the father visitation, is prohibited from contacting her daughter, and is ordered to pay the father $65,000 in restitution.
In 1997, these five- and six-year-old brothers were taken away from their mother, amid allegations that the mother deliberately kept the youngest child sick. The five-year-old was subsequently hospitalized when the father did not take care of his illness. The father threatened suicide at the hospital, and had to be subdued, disarmed and taken to a psychiatric hospital by police. Subsequently, the boys were placed in foster care. The five-year-old, who suffered from a rare blood sugar disease, became fatally ill and died after social worker and foster parents failed to provide appropriate medical care, in spite of the mother's pleas. The older boy is forced to live with his father, despite his statement that he wants to live with his mother, and statements by his older sister to CPS about sexual abuse by their father. He is only allowed to see his non-offending mother with a court monitor. The mother has won 3 wrongful death lawsuits against the father and the county totaling over $800,000.
This child, when she was 6 years old, was ripped from her mother's arms and given into the custody of her father whom she had reported molested her. She begs to come to live with her mother, who has spent several hundred thousand dollars trying to protect her.
Born in 1994, this little girl began disclosing sexual abuse when she was only 1˝ years old. She identified her father as the perpetrator. She eventually told a doctor, counselor and school teacher about the abuse. She had a cluster of symptoms indicative of sexual abuse, consisting of nightmares, night terrors, sexualized behavior, enuresis, fear of her father, depression, eating disorder, dissociation, extreme anger, physical pains, headaches, insomnia, nausea, and stomach aches. Despite documentation of the sexual abuse to the court, she is forced to stay unsupervised with her father. The child's attorney does not represent his client's wishes. The mother has spent approximately $150,000 trying to protect her child and is now without an attorney. She has not seen her child.
This boy, born in 1990, was placed in the custody of his mother after to his parents divorce, with overnight visits with his father. When he was less than two years old, he began reporting on-going sodomy by his father. He had a cluster of symptoms indicative of sexual abuse, including rectal bleeding, nightmares, night terrors, enuresis, encopresis, sexualized behavior, depression, extreme dissociation, intense anger, flashbacks, physical pains, insomnia, diarrhea, and stomach aches. The child disclosed the abuse to 5 teachers, family physician, therapists, police, family and friends. There were over 62 reports of suspected abuse in 7 years. Child Protective Services investigated and substantiated 7 reports of child sex abuse. The child wrote and talked to the judge, asking to live with his mother and grandmother. Instead, the court repeatedly placed him in the custody of his identified perpetrator. He called 911 for help from his father's house, and his therapist called the police to help him, and was put into expensive private foster care, rather than with his non-offending mother. He was able to stay with his mother while she was dying. Four months after her death, he was forcibly removed from his non-offending grandmother's care by armed police. He was placed in expensive foster care again for over six months, and is now forced by Juvenile Court to live with his identified perpetrator permanently. The child's attorneys did not represent his wishes, and functioned as de facto attorneys for the accused perpetrator.
This child, born in 1986, had nightmares and medical evidence of sexual abuse at age 4 ˝ years, and identified her father as the perpetrator. The judge ordered that the father's new wife supervise the visits. The child again disclosed molestation. CPS and the sheriff's department placed her in the Children's Receiving Home. After a 6 month investigation and UC Davis Medical Center examinations, the little girl was placed with her mother, and the father was not allowed visits. During reunification, the therapist recommended unsupervised visits. The mother fled with the child to Canada to protect her from further abuse. They were found after 11/2 years and the mother was put in jail. The child was forced to live with her identified perpetrator and did not see her mother for six years. She is currently being treated for suicide attempts and alcoholism.
These two boys were taken from their mother and given to their father when they were 12 and 15 years old, after they reported that their father abused them and threatened suicide. The father had brutally abused the mother during the marriage. When the boys asked their mother to motion the court to remove their court-appointed attorney who was threatening them, the judge gave guardianship of the boys to that attorney. The children protested being removed from their mother, pleaded with the judge and evaluator, refused to get on the airplane to be sent to another state, and were forced to go to live with the father. The younger child ran away from his father's home and cannot be found.
These three children reported sexual molestation by the father to numerous professionals. Physical evidence of the abuse was found for all three, and the children had psychological symptoms of nightmares, school phobias, eating disorders, and suicidal ideation. Both parents have equal time with the children due to evaluator recommendations.
In 1996 this 3 ˝ year old child, who lived in the custody of her mother, stated she was being touched by her father inappropriately during visits. The recommendation from the mediator was to have supervised visits, but the evaluator denied the molest, did not gather evidence, misquoted parties, and recommended 50/50 custody. The child again disclosed molest. When the judge still refused to provide supervised visits, CPS in another county took the child into protective custody and supervised visits were ordered. However, Sacramento County took jurisdiction and the evaluator said the mother had Parent Alienation. The judge forced both the girl and her brother to live with their father, despite ordering the father to attend anger control classes.
This little boy had speech problems, frequent ear infections and leg pains, nightmares, enuresis, fears and phobias. The mother divorced the physician father (who was in treatment for addiction to pornography) due to his violence and alcohol abuse. During the divorce proceedings, a custody evaluation report was written which the mother was not allowed to see. The father demanded custody of the child. The mother's attorney said she would lose all parental rights if she did not accede to the demand. She acceded and the child is now allowed to see his non-offending mother only under supervised conditions, despite the child's statements that his father abuses him.
This child reported sexual abuse by the father to numerous professionals. The child had medical and psychological evidence of sexual abuse, yet was required to visit the father unsupervised, due to evaluator's recommendations.
This child reported sexual abuse by the father. CPS investigation confirmed the abuse and there was medical evidence of sexual abuse. The child was required to visit the father unsupervised, due to the evaluator's recommendations.
San Bernardino County
In 1993 this child's mother divorced her father due to his physical abuse of the child. After a visit with her father, the child reported physical and sexual abuse. There was medical evidence of genital warts, bruises and welts. In 1995 after an evaluation, the mother was ordered to bring the child to court. The court forced the child to live with her identified perpetrator father. After the evaluation was overturned in a peer review, the child was placed half time with her mother. The evaluator did another report in 1997, and again recommended the child be placed with her father. After the child told her mother that she wanted to commit suicide, she was not allowed to see her mother at all. Now she may see her non-offending mother only with a court monitor present.
Born in 1989, this child was placed in the custody of his mother when he was 20 months old. His father had physically abused his mother for 9 years. The child returned from visits with the father with bruises, black eyes, a raw penis, headaches, ear aches, stomach aches and throat infections. At age 4, he had sexualize behavior, masturbation, nightmares, night terrors, enuresis, depression, dissociation, insomnia, nausea, and attention problems. The child tried to jump out of a moving car when he had to return to his father. The evaluator ignored hospital reports and police reports. The court gave full custody to the father in 1995, despite the child's stated desire to stay with his mother. Four months later he again disclosed sexual abuse to 12 professionals and 3 CPS workers. Nevertheless, the court forced him to remain in his father's custody, and has denied him any visits with his mother. The mother is now bankrupt.
These seven and ten year old children reported physical and sexual abuse by father. The father received full custody and mother is on supervised visits once per week when she can afford it.
San Diego County
Born in 1987, this child reported sexual abuse to his pediatrician when he was six years old. He had sexualized behavior, fears of his mother dying, depression, flashbacks, physical pains, headaches, insomnia, and stomach aches. He has a medical condition called Williams Syndrome in which his body ages rapidly, but he is younger in many ways than his biological age. In 1988 he and his mother had moved to a battered woman's shelter due to violence in the home. He stated he wanted to live with his mother, a teacher. Instead he is forced by the court to live with his violent father who had been convicted of DUI and stealing, and is permanently disabled with mental disability. The father moved the child to another state, and sees his mother only a few times per year. The child's attorney did not represent the child's wishes.
After a short marriage this child's parents separated in 1986. Custody of the one year old child was given to the mother. He returned from visits with the father with genital irritation. At age 2 ˝ he disclosed genital touching by the father, and at age 3 ˝ he displayed sexually precocious behavior to a therapist, and a deep bruise on his genitals. An evaluation was ordered. The evaluator recommended full custody to the father. The mother left the state with the child to protect him from further abuse. 1 ˝ years later the mother and child were apprehended. Both old and new abuse evidence was suppressed in court, through the efforts of a social worker. Although there was medical evidence of sexual abuse and evidence of abuse by the father from another victim, full custody was given to the father and the mother was placed on supervised visits. The child continued to disclose abuse. The father moved to another state, and the mother's visits have been thwarted.
In 1993 this three year old child began to reveal she was sexually abused by her father. The family court refused to consider any evidence of sexual abuse and ordered "molest cannot be an issue in this case". Unsupervised visits, and later temporary custody with the father, were ordered in 1994. An evaluator recommended that the child be removed from the mother's house due to "severe parental alienation." The mother was placed on supervised visits, and is now allowed weekends with the child. The evidence of molest is overwhelming, as testified to by 3 psychologists, a police investigator, an expert in child sexual abuse allegations, tape recordings of the child's disclosures, sexual acting out, photographs of the father naked with the child on his lap, and medical evidence of labial adhesions. . The attorney for the child does not listen to the child's wants, but indicates he is doing what is "best" for the child. The police determined probable cause, but the District Attorney declined to prosecute the father. This child ran away from her father's home.
San Luis Obispo County
Born in 1994, this child disclosed that he was being molested by his father when he was nine years old. He told counselors, CPS, and police, and had symptoms of nightmares, night terrors, enuresis and encopresis, excessive fears of men and anger, sexualized behavior, depression, suicide attempt, eating disorder, dissociation, intense anger, flashbacks, physical pains, headaches, insomnia, nausea, diarrhea, constipation, stomach aches. Despite this, the child was taken away from his safe mother and forced to live with his identified perpetrator. He has only been allowed to see his mother a few times with a therapist. The child's attorney did not represent the child's wishes. The mother has since died.
The underage mother became pregnant at age 16 by the father, who was then 19 years old. She left shortly after the child was born due to the father assaulting her and threatening her with a knife and a gun. The father continued to stalk and threaten the mother, who obtained a restraining order. In April 1999, the court awarded custody of this little boy, age 4 ˝, to the father, stating in a court order, "While the court observes that a change in the minor child's custody could be detrimental to his development, they must give the father custody due to alienation on the part of the plaintiff."
These two girls, born in 1987 and 1988, disclosed sexual abuse when they were 4 and 5 years old. The children had a cluster of symptoms indicative of sexual abuse, including sexualized behaviors, excessive fears, depression, eating disorder, dissociation, anger, flashbacks, physical pains, headaches, diarrhea, stomach aches, learning disability and attention deficit problems. They named the father, who is on welfare, as their perpetrator. Many CPS reports were made, yet the children were not protected, and were placed in the custody of the father.
This child, born in 1994, and his older brother and sister, were abused. The child reported to the police and therapist that his uncle sexually abused him. He displayed a cluster of symptoms indicative of sex abuse including nightmares, night terrors, enuresis, encopresis, excessive fears, sexualized behavior, anger, headaches, and insomnia. Two CPS reports were made. The father received custody, and the mother is not allowed to talk to anyone about her concerns.
San Mateo County
Born in 1989, this child was adopted and spent the first 9 years of her life with her stay-at-home mother. The father abused the child and the mother (put a knife to her stomach), and left the marriage several times. In 1995 the couple separated after 30 years of marriage. During supervised visits, the father said he was going to take the child away from her mother. The Special Master, chosen by the father's attorney, selected the therapist, attorney and evaluator. The evaluation, accusing the mother of parental alienation, was so biased that another evaluator wrote a report stating that it was entirely unprofessional. The child reported that the therapist said she would be taken away from her mother, and increased therapy to 3 to 4 times per week. In 1998 the father received full custody, despite the child's wish to remain with her mother.. The child has symptoms of depression, anger, dissociation, fear of sleeping, nightmares, night terrors, headaches, stomach aches, problems urinating, constipation, diarrhea, nausea, phobias, regression and learning disability. The mother, now without funds, has to represent herself against the father's attorney, and is forced to pay child support. She is unable to see her child and cannot afford the cost of supervised visits. The child's attorney did not represent the child's wishes. This child ran away from her father's home, but was forced by the police to return.
These twin boys, born in 1985, lived with their mother after their parents divorced in 1988 due to domestic violence by their father. The father, a convicted, registered sex offender, was convicted of spousal battery. He saw the children under supervised conditions because of the children's behaviors which were indicative of sexual abuse. He eventually obtained overnight visits. The father's attorney motioned the court to appoint a Special Master who then gave the father joint custody. The children disclosed sexual abuse, the District Attorney investigated, yet the mother was precluded from presenting evidence of the abuse, or have witnesses testify. The children, ages 11, were then taken away from their mother and forced to live in the full custody of their identified sex abuser against their will, and began to fail in school. The mother, representing herself, managed to remove the Special Master and the children's attorney, and have the judge recuse himself. However, the children still live with the father. At age 14 they refused to go back to their father's home. The police forced them to return. At 15, they succeeded in running away from home and returning to their mother.
San Mateo/Merced County
These young girls, born in 1988 and 1990, disclosed sexual abuse by their father in 1993. They reported the abuse to CPS, police investigators, teachers, sheriffs, nurses, physicians, hospital staff, Sunday school staff and friends. They had a cluster of symptoms indicative of sexual abuse, including sexualized behavior, nightmares, night terrors, enuresis, encopresis, excessive fears of their mother leaving, and being with their father, depression, suicide attempt, eating disorder, dissociation, anger, physical pains, headaches, insomnia, nausea, diarrhea, constipation, stomach aches, learning disability and attention problems. They were placed in the full custody of their mother, and received Victims of Crime funding for treatment for the crimes committed against them. Two years later, in 1996, they were ordered by the court to see their father for unsupervised visits. On one visit they stated they were brutally raped, and had bruises, labial lacerations and loss of intact hymen. Physical evidence and documents disappeared, the mother was arrested for child abduction despite having custody, and the father was given temporary legal, but not physical custody. However, the father took the children to his home, and has refused to allow the mother to see them.
Santa Clara County
This child, born in 1996, displayed sexualized behavior, eating disorders, depression, dissociation, anger, physical pains, insomnia, stomach aches and attention problems. He disclosed sexual abuse when he was 5 years old and named his father and girlfriend as perpetrators. The father has been convicted of DUIs. The court ordered that the abuse was not to be talked about, and the child was placed in the primary care of his father, despite wanting to live with his mother. The child's attorney did not represent the child's wishes.
This child, born in 1990, began having symptoms at age 1 ˝. He had nightmares, excessive fears of being taken away from his mother, sexualized behavior, depression, dissociation, anger, headaches, insomnia, stomach aches, and learning disability. When he was eight years old, he had encopresis. He banged his head on tables, and acted out by hitting. He named his father as perpetrator of sexual abuse, and told the police. There is medical evidence of abuse, and 3 or 4 CPS reports. However, based on the evaluator's report, the court ordered that sole physical custody be given to the father. Despite the medical evidence of abuse, including cigarette burns, and the child's wishes to be with his mother, he is forced to remain with his father. He has minimal visitation with his mother. The child's attorney did not represent the child's wishes.
This child, born in 1993 was in his mother's sole custody after the parents divorced in 1995. The child had nightmares, night terrors, anger, stomach aches and attention problems. The court accused the mother of "alienation" and changed custody to the father when the child was 2 years old. The mother was placed on supervised visitation.
This child, born in 1993, was taken away from his mother, who was accused of "alienation". He and his seven and nine-year-old siblings were placed with their father without a custody trial. The Special Master changed the time share to 95% with the father, despite their wishes to remain with their mother. The mother was placed on supervised visitation which she cannot afford, so these children have been unable to see her. The child had depression, eating disorder, anger, physical pains, insomnia, nausea, diarrhea, constipation, stomach aches, weight gain and learning disability. The oldest child, who was not moved to the father's custody, experienced a drastic reduction in symptoms, including asthma, when he stopped seeing the father at age 15.
These two boys, born after their parents'1990 marriage, have dual citizenship (Finnish/ American). Their mother told Finnish authorities about their disclosures of abuse in 1994. She filed for divorce, after experiencing domestic violence. After the boys were placed in joint custody, their mother fled to Finland with them. The father was awarded full custody and the children were returned to the United States.
This child was taken away from her mother and placed in the custody of her father. The court ordered all contact severed with her mother when she was eight years old. The professionals in this case have multiple roles, and were appointed despite the mother not signing an agreement for a special masters as required by law. The first special master then appointed the second, who continued making orders after her term expired, and issued orders without hearings.
This child disclosed that his father beat him with a belt, and described sexual abuse after sexual acting out behavior. After the judge ordered a new evaluator, the special master recommended that the son be taken away from his mother and forced to live with the father, and the daughter be placed in foster care. Despite the lack of written agreement for the special master, she issued a change of custody order to the father, severely limiting the mother's contact with her children.
This child lived with the mother, who was the main parent. Eventually the father got de facto custody when the child was seven, after the evaluator recommended a reversal of the 60/40 time share.
Although the parents agreed on a living arrangement, the special master ordered an evaluation, and threatened to have custody changed if the mother did not comply with the evaluation. The special master continued acting after her appointment had expired. When mother complained, the court ordered an attorney for child.
This teen-aged girl is forced to live with her step-father, a convicted sex offender.
When she was 4, this child had a vaginal rash, cuts and a discharge. The doctor called CPS which ordered a rape SART exam. The investigation concluded the abuse allegations were unfounded, despite the child's comments and later she had another rash. This time, the mother was accused of "parental alienation syndrome" and the mother lost custody. She can only see her mother every other weekend. Now she is seven years old and cries when she has to return to her father. She wants to know if someday she gets to decide where she gets to live.
This child reported sexual abuse by the father who was stalking the mother. When the mother called the police about the stalking, the boy was taken from his mother by the police and immediately placed with his father. He is only allowed to see his mother under supervised conditions. He continues to disclose sexual abuse through his sexualized behavior.
May 2010 Washington DC Trip - Case Studies
My son has been physically, mentally and sexually abused by his father. The abuse to my son was first disclosed when my son was 4 years old. Numerous child abuse reports have been filed by medical doctors, psychologists, school personnel and other professionals involved in my son's case. The professionals with information of the abuse were not contacted by the County Department of Human Resources (DHR) as ordered by the Judge. The abuse disclosures were not investigated or handled correctly by the County DHR who has declared "no abuse" occurred on my son and placed my son with the person who he has named over and over as his abuser, his father. Due to the lack of representation from the assigned Guardian Ad Litem and the improper investigation by the county DHR, full sole custody was award to his father. It saddens me to no end that I cannot protect my son from future abuse from his father. My son's cry for help has been silenced!
My son was born out of a relationship with a man I hardly knew. I married him due to the pregnancy and over the next several months found out that he had a secret drug life, he was a pathological liar, had an obsession with perverted pornography, main anal sex (which he manically downloaded from the internet, constantly asked me for, but I always refused) and that the veneer of his life was all a lie. He didn't like to or want to work. His parents still supported him to a large degree in his late 30's.
When my son was only 1 1/2 I threw my ex out for the final time. He went into a drug program because I believed he was advised by his parents and perhaps others that he would lose custody of my son if he did not. A mediator advised that as long as he was in the program and clean and sober, I should give him the custody because the court would anyway, and looking like the alienating parent was not a good move in California divorce court, but that when he went back to his drugs, which was predictable, I could move forward in court at that time.
In the meantime, he had began behaving sexually inappropriately with my son, with the behavior escalating over time until my son was coming home putting objects up his anus and trying to put objects up other children's anus', incessantly licking things like he was performing felatio, and coming home very emotionally disturbed from the visits. When asked where he learned that, he would respond "Daddy." He was speech delayed. The situation got worse, when my ex started beating him to both keep him quiet and I believe now to terrorize me. He was also giving my son drugs/toxic substances which made him very sick. The court had ordered that he be drug tested upon my request. This triggered a mission to punish/terrorize me through my son, and to satisfy his own addictive-perverted sexual needs through the child, who to him, was an extension of me. His goals were to get custody away from me, to control the child, and get child support from me. I am a doctor.
For the purpose of consolodating this story, I was sent to prison, after being railroaded by the Napa court, having my money embezzled through the court and placed in my ex's lawyers trust fund while I was denied my own money for counsel. I have been denied all visitation. The child,s attorney suppressed evidence my attorney had given to protect my son. The police prosecuted me and suppressed an emergency room medical report calling markings on my son child abuse. Court transcripts were changed to cover up the abuse. I've lost my 12-year medical business, my beautiful home, many of my friends who think police officers and judges are honest and really were unable to deal with this situation year after year. But, this is nothing compared to the fact that my son has not been in my life since 2005, and is in the hands of an abusive father. The child's attorney reports that my son, now 10 1/2, still goes into his father's bed, has difficulty sleeping at night and is in pain at night from an injury he got while I was serving my prison term. I have photos of my son with a rope around his neck, an activity that took place while he was with his father.
My son and I still have no justice in California.
Amador County, California
In 1993, I ended an 8 year marriage because of my husband's admitted abuse of the children and me, which included a brutal physical assault on one son.
In 1996, my two daughters (ages 7 & 4) disclosed that their father had been sexually abusing them during court ordered visits, which included acts of rape, sodomy, oral copulation, being shown child pornography, and being forced to re-enact the sex acts depicted. These disclosures were corroborated by the disclosures of their brother (aged 9), physical evidence of penetration in one child, the report of an independent eye witness to the father's sexual assault of that same child, and raw data test results of the father's psychological evaluation that matched the test results of 710 incarcerated pedophiles in 9 different studies with 99.98% accuracy. I was found mentally, emotionally, and psychologically healthy in testing and had an impeccable social history.
Although law enforcement substantiated the sexual abuse, the father was not criminally prosecuted and the issue of the children's safety was relinquished to the family court. The children's therapists declared to the court that the children would be in danger in their father's care and fought for their protection.
The court appointed custody evaluator/psychologist disregarded the father's history of domestic violence, refused to investigate the sexual abuse of the children, alleged that I had coached the children to lie about the abuse due to "parental alienation syndrome," and recommended the father have sole custody. In a custody trial, the attorney appointed to represent the children filed, and was granted, a motion to suppress all the evidence of the father's history of domestic violence and child sexual abuse. The evaluator stated in testimony, "Anything the children's therapists would tell me about them being sexually abused, I would completely ignore." The children were immediately placed in the father's sole custody and were prohibited from contact with me, their brothers, and the rest of their maternal family, followed months later by an order limiting them to one hour of supervised visits per week with me only.
The custody evaluator was disciplined by the State Board of Psychology for bias and gross negligence in the case. The judge was removed from the case and was disciplined by the State Commission on Judicial Performance for biased and unlawful conduct. Despite these State findings and disciplinary actions, the family court refused to correct its errors and return custody to me.
In 2003, my son ran away from his father and came home to live with me. He disclosed years of continued abuse of him and his sisters by their father to both CPS and the family court. CPS refused to intervene, and the family court refused to correct its errors and return custody of my daughters to me.
In 2007, I won an appeal. The appellate court instructed the trial court to hear evidence of continued paternal sexual abuse and my son's testimony about his father's history of custodial interference and constant attempts to destroy the mother/child relationship. At a new trial, the judge announced that he "didn't have to" respect the appellate court instruction and ordered my daughters to remain in the custody of their offender. My children were "sentenced to life" with their abuser. Their childhoods were stolen. Our lives were completely destroyed by the family court.
Mariposa and Sonora, California and Las Vegas, Nevada
After 20 years in an abusive relationship, being isolated and raped, and my seven children being verbally, emotionally, mentally, physically and possibly sexually abused, I filed for divorce. Originally a career woman from Europe, I had become a stay-at-home mom, living in isolated settings with no transportation most of the time, homeschooling the children. I did not have money to hire aggressive attorneys, which my ex did.
So far, 10 years of custody battle have been going on, during which I lost custody of my children on and off thanks to manipulated reports by court appointed evaluators, my practice was destroyed four times, I became homeless on and off, my son (a dwarf) had his condition exploited as he was ordered to submit to an unnecessary and traumatic surgery and was labeled "Learning Disabled" (which he is not); we are still going to court monthly so the judge can, as he wrote to another judge, "keep me on a short leash".
After the four younger teenagers ran away the second time from their father's abuse (we had learned that he had raped and molested his sisters for years and, besides beating our children and not feeding them, he had put one in a psychiatric clinic and was threatening the others with the same treatment), my 23-year old daughter and I were arrested by US Marshals on false charges and put in jail. Because she tried to intervene to protect her younger siblings and had asked for custody if I could not have it, my daughter spent 3-4 days in jail, which destroyed her career; she had no counsel, no public defender and our family attorney was not informed of the hearing so my daughter could not truly defend herself and was able to get out on the condition that she paid her father's attorney fees as bail.
After I spent six months in maximum security with murderers and drug dealers, being subjected to abusive guards and without the healthcare I needed, for a crime I never committed, a public defender threatened me with seven years of prison if I did not sign the plea bargain, which I refused to do. He then deceived me into signing a "West Plea" (he told me meant I did not agree to having committed the crime). The public defender told me that because none of my 40 witnesses would be allowed to testify and I was court ordered not to speak about domestic violence or child abuse, it was not worth going to trial. I got five years probation as a felon, which destroyed my career one more time, made me dependent on my older children for financial support and, worst of all, I did not see my younger children for almost two years.
Four judges and the DA's office are involved in the "plot" that put my daughter and me in jail, and in the forgery of documents used to deceive the Governor into signing an extradition warrant; the affidavit for that warrant, which is exculpatory in nature, remains sealed, by court order. My Habeas Corpus is being stalled from court to court; neither the Attorney General, nor the Governor has been willing to "right the wrong".
My youngest son, now 15, is still hostage of the court: if he does not obey the judge's orders (visitation, trips with the father, and submitting to multiple medical and educational tests which he does not need), I can be put back in jail; the six older children want nothing to do with their father and are waiting for the youngest one to be "done with the custody" to move on with their lives.
I was urged to file a restraining order by the police, due to mental anguish and abuse by my daughter's father. Her father tried to cut his wrist; he urged me to commit suicide and if I agreed he was going to tell me about his friendship with his supervisor. (Our daughter was 6 at the time).We made a signed agreement for 50/50 custody, for the best interest of our daughter. At the time, I made 1/8 the income of my ex. A Custody Evaluation was done on rushed circumstances. Out of it came more lies. I was ordered to have supervised visits, with out any evidence at all- on any abuse because there was none. I could not afford the payments of further visitation, and take care of my three other children at the same time. The father paid for the court-appointed psychologist who sided with father. My daughter started to urinate on herself during school, have frequent yeast infections etc. The father broke in and robbed my house, and my daughter witnessed it 3 times. The father tried to run mother over with his vehicle at one visit. While representing myself as pro per counsel, the commissioner stated, "I will not read anything you submit." I turned the court appointed psychologist into the Board of Psychology causing the therapist to retaliate and take my daughter completely away from me. I compiled subpoenas for various people, including the Commissioner, court appointed psychologists, Yahoo.com, fathers employment, and father's landlord. I filed he subpoenas and then compiled a complaint about the Commissioner's actions (275 litigants complaining about same abuse by court representative). The commissioner recused herself from the case (August 21, 2006) for violating several oaths of office regulations. The evaluation was re-assessed by DABPS (Forensic Physiologist). He concluded grossly inadequate, incorrect method and many other key elements that were omitted by court-appointees. A scheduled court hearing produced a document allowing all subpoenas except one: Yahoo.com. I stated on the record, the facts of the ex parte communication (documented) and all court officers who conspired together in falsifying the record. The judge denied all motions (even when no reply, rebuttal or response was offered by any party, including the opposing party). He then suspended access to my records. No reason was offered. I filed a criminal case against the Visitation Supervisor and others. Judge told me if I come forward, "You could be killed." I submitted contempt charges on judge for ex parte communication, with all pertinent documentation to facts. The transcript was changed. From 2005 to 2010, I have seen my daughter seven times. The order gives the father the right to choose if he wants my daughter to be able to see her mother. I only get 15 minute calls, on Tuesday- if the father allows them.
My two children were adopted on June 11, 2004. My then-husband left us 10 days later. He paid no child support nor did he see us for 2 years, during which time he had a mandatory lobechtomy (removal of front portion of brain). He became violent and his cognitive thinking worsened. After the 3rd court-ordered visit, where my children returned injured, beaten or ill, I moved to Alabama to work. California did not follow the Uniform Child Custody and Jurisdiction Act and refused for 5 years to grant a change of jurisdiction to follow the children. During this time I was their sole caretaker and financial supporter. My ex abused us through the courts by calling for hearings sometimes 7 times a year, all on made-up incidents, making me commute between Alabama and California, all the while paying no child support. He received no consequences for any of his false accusations or antics. In 2006 my daughter made her first report of sexual abuse by telling me "John likes to tickle my itchies" and pointing to her vagina. She had all the symptoms including head banging, telling people she was "ugly" and nightmares. CPS refused to interview her because she was under 5 yrs, so it was ignored. In 2007 she made her second testimony to sexual abuse describing a molestation in a group shower event to forensic interview specialists, CPS and teachers. Alabama courts took immediate jurisdiction and found my children credible. My ex admitted to the group shower event to the police, after 3 interviews and changing his story each time. No lie detector test was given after he "admitted" it, since it seemed he was being cooperative now and the machine was broken the day he came in to the Sheriff's Department. California regained jurisdiction and immediately took my children from me without warning and placed them with their identified molestor. My daughter had lost all control of her bowels by this time. The minor's counsel and evaluator supressed all the evidence including the transcript from the hearing in Alabama where 5 professionals found my children credible and believable. I was accused of "parental alienation" of my ex by telling my children that the sexual molestation events were wrong and how to protect themselves. There was no evidence against me, and during my 7 years as a single parent, not one doctor/teacher/therapist accused me of being anything other than a wonderful and caring parent. Even the District Attorney, who refused to try my ex in criminal court said my children were lucky to have me fighting for them. Both children were sent to a therapist to silence them, and I have not seen or heard from them since that day. My daughter is doing horrible in school and 2 years later, still has no control over her bowels.
What began as a separation from a man who was becoming increasingly more violent and emotionally abusive turned into something unimaginable.
My son was becoming increasingly more depressed and felt I had no other options.
I discovered that my husband had a sexual addiction and had introducing the children to pornography, he was with multiple partners of both sexes, was paying for sex and had posted himself on Craig's list.
This evidence was found on our family computer and my son who was 16 at the time shared this information.after we separated and moved out.
Two separate agencies filed reports on behalf of the minor children and then everything turned upside down.
This man launched an attack on me as an unfit mother trying to get full custody. The court determined that this was his personal business and gave joint custody week on week off. During the next four years there were many ex parte motions where father would claim repeatedly that I was interfering with his time, breaking orders etc. Actually, the opposite was true.
The court always believed the father and he won each motion.
These efforts were intended to continue to abuse, conceal his issues, family finances and try not to pay child support. Our daughter told many people she missed her mother and wanted more time with her, she also had complained of vaginal rashes and bladder infections since she was three years old.
Three years would go by and the child would reveal to a teacher issue that would bring CPS in again. Our Daughter told her teacher that her dad was touching her vagina and it hurt and she wanted it to stop. She was 7 years old then.
CPS report inconclusive, the teacher testified, I testified, the judge believe the father and the minors council who parroted the statement of father.
This man would now force the school to fire the teachers involved and myself. He would continue to damage my career and reputation while hiding behind his money and position. I tried to have minors council removed. Because she held privilege so she would make statements on behalf of the therapist that were untrue. She was now privately paid by the father.
I was often self-represented since I did not have enough money for the expensive lawyers. I have exhausted my retirement fund and everything I have to protect my parental rights and my daughter. My daughter is 9 years old now.
After 4.5 years I have learned that its not good parenting that is the benchmark for custody…it's how much you can pay and who you know. I am a loving mom I have lost custody and access to my child.
In August 2006 my ex husband, after separation, came to our home to visit our 2-year-old.
At 9pm he darted out the door with my baby, slamming my arms in the door and bruising me.
In April 2007, he ran me over with his vehicle and broke my foot at a police station, while both my children witnessed the incident. There were no consequences for either, other than one night in jail. In July 2008, I had several problems with my ex husband not allowing counseling for our daughter after forcing her to scream 3 times a week during exchanges. He also lied profusely about his medical insurance in an effort to have the doctor's deny her care for her eye condition, Esotropia. In an effort to eliminate problems and get my daughter care both health and medical, I filed for sole legal custody. My ex retaliated. He lied maliciously to the courts, slowly building a false case. Being that his claims of stalking, custody interference, etc. were not true, I didn't think much of it. He had no evidence. December 2008 I showed up not represented to court for a hearing set only for child support. The judge asked me questions such as if I was stalking my ex husband, contacting CPS and interfering with custody at our daughter's school. I thought little of it since it was not true and told her none of it was true. Apparently, I learned later that my ex husband had filed a supplemental declaration with false allegations. He had claimed I had interfered with custody at our daughter's school, (the day he claimed this occurred our daughter wasn't at school)l. He made claims of stalking, a fantasy he had since marriage and claimed that I contacted CPS and said he was sexually abusing our daughter, something I never did. A week after our hearing, I received a court order in the mail. My baby who I raised everyday for 5 1/2 years was taken from my primary care and I was only going to be allowed to see her 3 days a week. Additionally, I was removed from her school Mondays through Wednesdays and not allowed for any reason. My ex knew when he made this false claim I was the mom who volunteered the most in the class. I spent hundreds and hundreds of hours proving my innocence, gathering facts. I was treated like a criminal and was being punished for his lies, not anything that ever happened. I spent 11 months in the court and I will never
forget the day the judge said I needed a wake up call. She believed that I did these things. During this time that I lost custody, my ex who felt he had won, attacked me repeatedly. He went as far as setting me up for identity theft on his identity. I lost thousands more collecting evidence that he set the whole thing up. He filed a felony investigation against me. Finally after psychological testing it proved that he was a liar, antisocial personality disorder traits and that I was honest. The psychologist recommended my daughter back into my primary care. In court the judge's perspective on me changed, but she said she wasn't going to play good guy/ bad guy, so she was going to go 50/50 custody. I lost 23% custody due to lies and over 60k later to gain only 5% custody back, my ex still faced no consequences for his malicious actions. Additionally, I hired an investigative firm. They did more than 100 hours of investigative work and proved my ex is a psychological risk to both my daughter and myself. Today we work with a Special Master and my ex continues to torment me, now using his girlfriend to file false police reports which
include both me and my older daughter. In March 2010 she filed a report that we were stalking her 9 year old daughter at her school and her husband's home. It is never ending.
I am a mother who raised her child for the first 8-years of her life. She flourished in my care, where we lived in only home she'd ever known. My ex-husband abandoned our child for nearly 2-years, & re-entered our lives to reduce child support. When he was denied financial hardship, & child support increased, he went to the only alternative: increase custody. He referred us to a local 'PAS' mediator who recently had her national license revoked, & is under investigation with the BBS for unethical behavior. This mediator traumatized our daughter after a frightening 15-minute reunification session with her father. After I terminated her services and filed a formal complaint, I was retaliated against, by being labeled an "alienator", & 100% reversal of custody to the father was recommended. This was immediately ordered by the court, without Due Diligence or evidence. The judge blatantly stated "The child will be traumatized".
"30-Days of No Contact" turned into 60, before I could spend one-hour, once per week, at the highest level (and most expensive) supervised visitation. My daughter was treated like a POW, lived in her father's garage, & attempted 'PAS' brainwashing techniques were used to convince her I was not a good mother, did not love her, nor want her back. I spent thousands of dollars to fight for custody of my child, & was denied time & again, though the allegations proven false. Twice, the judge denied proving a Statement of Decision. She is on record denouncing me, saying "I know what kind of mother YOU are--I heard you wore a shirt with your daughter's picture on it!" My child has been traumatized, punished, lost body mass & deteriorated physically, mentally & emotionally. She is suffering childhood depression & lives in constant fear of punishment from her father. Her attorney refuses to fight for her wishes & legal rights. Sacramento Family and Children's Services is a frightening cottage industry, rapidly & routinely ripping innocent children like mine from the loving arms of their mothers. Please, don't let me miss my little girl another day, another Mother's Day.
I am a mother of two women, both productive members of society without any legal blemishes, and I am a grandmother of two (9-year and 8-year old granddaughters). I have also been a Social Worker for over 25 years, working for children's best interests, and have been considered by the Court to be an expert witness in child/parent bonding. After my daughter's divorce, her ex-husband disappeared, and had his next child two months before his divorce was final; two more children followed by the end of the next year. Within days of the 3rd birth he immediately filed a motion for hardships to reduce child support, but when it was denied, and it was clear he would not win a trial after abandonment, his attorney suggested we allow the child to go to 'reconnection' therapy with a therapist she and the father chose. I looked at the woman's credentials, but what I did not know was that they were false, and that she was the guru of Parental Alienation Syndrome with a long history of using her "junk science" diagnosis to remove children from their mothers. To this day, I regret accepting what I saw on that card as fact; I had never worked with a therapist who lied or was unethical in all the years of my career, and if we had done some homework, would never have agreed to her, and this letter would be someone else's.
The wheels of the Sacramento Family Court Cottage Industry began to turn, and based on a 15 minute interview with the child, this 'PhD,' (later disproved), wrote a 25-page scathing report about the mother, about ME as an alienating grandparent, because I had been married more than once (she had refused my request to be interviewed and provide my expertise about my granddaughter, and actually threw me out of her office, yelling that I was the problem!), and suggested my 8-year-old granddaughter could be removed and 100% custody given to the father. I filed a complaint with the BBS who felt it serious enough to refer to Consumer Affairs Investigation, with at least 5 others to date. Still, this infamous therapist's report went to her favorite Judge and Mediator, the Unholy Trinity, who rubber stamped each other, and on April Fools Day 2009, I lost my granddaughter. She was 'given' to the absent father 100%, with no pre-placement visits, and was denied ANY contact with her mother, or any of our family, including myself, for more than 100 days. She lost everything she knew; her home, her dog, her Mama, and Gramma, and went through trauma that the Judge actually acknowledged, yet sanctioned, and a year later, my granddaughter has physically and emotionally deteriorated, showing every sign of childhood depression. None of us know the pain she has suffered, but I know the pain our family did, and despite my daughter being completely vindicated of any wrong-doing, my granddaughter's own court-ordered attorney, part of the industry, continues the rubber stamping, despite her continued request to be returned to her mother, so is forced to live with her father 50% of the time, in his garage. This 8-year-old lost everything, for the sole purpose of her father's desire to pay NO child support. Yes, the Judge gave him what he wanted, a child for money, and LOTS of money, thousands paid to attorneys, therapists, Judges, much of it paid by you, the taxpayer. The ultimate cost, however, was an 8-year-olds loss in the belief that the world is a safe place.
San Diego , California
A mediated divorce was finalized in 2002 with me (mom) getting custody of my three boys (4, 6, and 8 at the time). In 2003, during a visit with their father, my youngest son reported an incident of sexual abuse, which was corroborated by his older brother. The DV judge issued a restraining order, CPS ordered supervised visits and the police placed the father on the Child Abuse Central Index after brief interviews and a failed polygraph. The police did not attempt to get any physical evidence or my ex's computer (I had reported catching him with child porn) and then said that they could not give it to the D.A. because there was not enough evidence. The case was shunted into family court where the judge refused to do the thorough investigation required by law and instead increased the father's visitation to half-time. I was told by my son's court-appointed minor's counsel that if I continued to report abuse I would lose custody and visitation.
My son continued to say he was being abused and had many symptoms: bedwetting, night terrors, night sweats, fear of bedtime/dark, sexualized behavior, anxiety, isolating behavior, etc. So, after 2 years of trying to protect my son in family court, I gave up and we went into hiding, during which time my son's symptoms went away. After three years, the D.A. reviewed my case, and, due to the strong evidence, dismissed all abduction charges against me. The D.A. and the family court judge assured me that if I returned to San Diego , Damon would be listened to and protected. So we returned, but, instead, the family court judge took my children (then 12, 14 and 16) away from me and gave full custody of the older boys to the father against their will. They were all begging to be back with me. Since my youngest son is terrified of being alone with his father (his father threatened to kill him if he told anyone about the abuse) and is refusing to go with him, the court has left him with guardians for the last two years. I have zero custody and no contact with my children.
San Jose, California
I had 4 boys and finally, one little girl in my 40's when my husband began strategically planning to take them all away from me. He had been reported to C.P.S. for various violent acts upon the children in their toddler years and had always brought up my abusive upbringing as the culprit of his problems. In May of 2003, he broke my arm and left me for dead across the street from a local Police Station after dragging me from a Suburban in the throws of an argument at a marriage therapy session. He was acquitted and put me in a coma 8 months later, made it look like a suicide attempt and was given full custody. Our daughter was diagnosed w/a broken hymen and I was told she had been brutally raped "that morning" when she was only 3&1/2 years old. He was not only given full custody, but I was then "stayed away" and now have to pay a minimum of $165 for a two-hour visit with the two youngest of my five children. I am broke, alone, in the ghetto and completely without resources now. My daughter has never known her Mom and my sons have been told their Mom went crazy and abandoned them.
Santa Rosa, California
In 1999/2000, my attorney failed to disclose that she had previously committed Grand Theft three years earlier, yet was still practicing family law. I had given her $23,000 as a retainer fee to protect my then-custody right with my four-year-old son. That attorney started the trial behind chambers then left me in the middle of the trial due to her pending Grand Theft Charges. The Judge placed me in the position of continuing on with no consideration of obtaining an attorney. A month later I was tipped-off to the charges and it was confirmed on record. My Judge stated it should be a mistrial and then had me continue on for 45 days. I lost my son, (my home) equity, good credit history and life as I knew it in America. I was sanctioned $235,000 in attorney fees. I went from parenting full-time to part-time, then after Father's private investigator's false allegations against me I went to supervised visits. In less than a year I was not able to see my son and his Father moved him from our town. A year later a doctor declared that my son was in danger in every way, mentally, emotionally, and physically. The father and his family have spent $1,700,000, hired 15 attorneys, experts and private investigators. I have been dragged thru Superior, Bankruptcy, Supreme and Federal court in three cities, which have resulted in fourteen years of false allegations and litigation. Our son has gone through what most prisoners of war could not survive, due to the brain washing. This pass June my son again was removed from our home except for one 24 hour period every two weeks, I was told I did not need to know where he lived, which is against family state code. I discovered he resides in a small converted shed, no garbage service, cable, Internet, land line. I have not seen him now for two months and the hearing is set out for not one, but two more months. Nothing has been shown in 14 years nor factually placed against me to support the abuse and isolation by not only the Father but the courts and the experts he has hired.
I'm the mother of 4 children. When my ex-husband was asked to move out of our family home due to domestic violence issues, he purchased the home directly behind me and the stalking began. He was arrested twice for stalking and a permanent restraining order was issued as well as 50-50 custody. There have been over 17 cases sent to the District Attorney's Office for stalking and violations of the restraining order, and none of the cases have been filed.
The Apple Valley Police Department has assigned an officer to this case due to its complicated and serious nature. My ex-husband has: wrapped our children up in carpet, x-mas tree netting, hit them, tied them up in belts, called them names, force them to eat food from the garbage, and continues to violate the restraining order with no consequences.
He has filed a law suit against my homeowner's insurance company for false arrest, garnished my wages for child support, wrote in an e-mail stating that "your acts could result in the death of our children", and told me that I'm an abusive mother for putting our children through all of this.
Recently, my puppy was found dead in the back yard of my new home with a bullet in her chest, and my ex-husband has filed a document with the court stating that a third party will bring "serious personal injury to my children and me." We continue to live in fear.
Daytona Beach, Florida
In April 2002, my daughter's school called and told me that she (age 7) was acting out sexually, had sexual knowledge beyond her years, was masturbating. Then same daughter, in Sunday school class said "I suck my daddy's penis". In the therapists office, her summary said, my two daughter's at 6 and 8 were exhibiting eroticized behavior, arranging Barbie and anatomical dolls in suggestive sexual positions". I was also finding their father, (my husband of 11 yrs.) doing inappropriate things to them, one example, wiping down their vaginas before school. I am a "Squeeky Clean" class mom, soccer Mom, community volunteer, no drugs, no alcohol, and I filed for divorce in Jan.2004, with documented abuse to protect them, but the family court refused to remove him from the home during the 3 year divorce.
Then he punched my eldest daughter in the mouth and split her lip. The inappropriate behavior by him to the children continued. In July 2006,I filed an Injunction of Protection, and it was denied by the same family court judge who was my divorce judge, Judge Shawn L. Briese, who said there is no domestic violence, no child abuse or sexual abuse and said my daughter lied, and I believed her, and has refused my witness's in to testify regarding the documented abuse, and their safety concerns.
On April 3, 2007, Judge Briese and gave father sole physical custody, removed me from the family home in 14 days, and placed me on Supervised Visitation. I spent $80,000 and appealed the judge's ruling, and won. They said that this judge violated my constitutional rights to due process, abuse of trial discretion, and REVERSED and REMANDED back to the lower court, with the same judge, but he refused to remove the unjust supervised visitation order. After spending $140,000 in the last 3 years, I am now Pro se in the 5th District Court of Appeals (Case 5D09-3752) asking to be reunited with my children.
My contact for 3 years has been under supervised visitation at the local center, with only 63 hours of contact, the 2nd and 4th Saturday of the month for 1 hour.
My case is a Justice for Children case and they advocate for children in abusive situations when "official avenues", judges, police, DCF all have failed to protect them. My daughter's teacher said if you of all Mothers can lose custody of your children, America better wake up, because if it can happen to you it can happen to anyone.
I am a grandmother, who at one time was raising my beautiful granddaughter when Child Protective Services began an investigation on my daughter. I had been the child's care taker with documentation for almost a year. The investigators knew this as they harassed me and my husband for three months. Then, one day CPS came and removed my granddaughter and her newborn brother from my care. Then they kept them, made allegations of abuse, abandonment and neglect against the biological parents (unfounded) since the poor kids didn't live with their parents. This is a classical definition of kidnapping.
We had a trial for dad and we brought all of this out, after three years had passed. It took three years to get a trial, a trial that would be decided by one sole person, bought and paid for by our governor.
I will never forget the day I had to take my granddaughter to her grandfather's home, he was appointed caregiver, a child molester, she jumped to the back of our car and cried till she could cry no more, and after we put her inside the home, she ran to the window, her words were grandma, please don't leave me, please. I failed her. I am sure, that God, will come back one day, and bring in a long awaited justice to this current government, I hope I live to see this.
Outcome: My grandchildren are up for adoption now, poor kids, kidnapped, mentally and emotionally damaged for life.
Signed: Committed Grandmother
I married a man in 1996. I gave birth to twins the same year. Two years following that event I gave birth to my youngest child. In 1999, I divorced my husband. During the time that I was living and married to him, he abused me daily. During the time that I was abused, I was afraid to tell anyone about what was happening for fear that he would do harm to me and the children. In 2002, I was awarded an injunction for protection and my ex received supervised visitation at the highest monitoring level by another Duval County Judge (I was told I would never lose the children because of the extensive history of abuse). In 2007, Billy hired another attorney and had the family law judge changed for our case in Duval County. For 8 years, I never had any problems with the judges in Duval County until Judge McCaullie came on my case. In 2008, I lost custody of my children due to a one-sided Judge. Judge McCaullie received substantial evidence to prove that I was stabbed by my ex in May of 2008 and the Judge never responded to any of my findings of fact. The overwhelming facts, DNA verification, fingerprints, blood analysis, etc. to reverse the custody order were dismissed by the Judge. In December of 2009, the children were beaten and abused by their father and finally he had to surrender custody of the children to the State of Georgia. An emegency custody order was filed twice with Judge McCaullie both in December of 2009 and February of 2010 and at both times the Judge determined that this was deemed not an emergency and was dismissed. All 3 children were transferred into the foster home in Kingsland, Georgia. One of the children had to be transferred to the United Methodist boys home because the foster parents did not want to hande all 3 children at the same time. Two years later, I am fighting to get my kids back. I have spent countless hours talking via phone and in person to doctors, judges, lawyers, counselors, police officers, teachers, coaches, children, etc. The Georgia Judge supported my findings, but the Florida Judge (McCaullie) (which was supposed to be my judge) undermined me during the entire legal process. Judge McCaullie placed the children into the hands of the abuser and they were abused by him on several occasions.
I am the mother of three children I had with my ex-husband and primary abuser (the oldest two are twins). The abuse started when I was six months pregnant with my twins and my ex-husband tried to choke me by pulling me off the ground by my neck causing me to go into labor and I had to be rushed to the hospital. The abuse has not stopped since that time almost 14 years ago with the worst violence occurring on May 16, 2008, when my ex-husband stabbed me in the back during a visitation exchange while I was turned to get the children's clothes out of the car. According to the attending medical professionals, if he had gone even two inches lower he would have punctured my lungs. He took off to the neighboring state (where he currently lives) and they arrested him when he returned the children to me on Sunday. They recovered a knife with my blood on it from the driver side pocket in the door. Two days later, the judge refused my request for a postponement since my attorney was unable to attend, and made me attend a hearing and sit less than two feet away from the man who just stabbed me. The judge refused to discuss or consider that my ex-husband was wearing an ankle bracelet from the stabbing incident and gave my ex-husband primary custody of the children stating that he thought it was inappropriate that I did not put his name in on the emergency contact form at school (even though he travels for work and lives in a neighboring state so he can not be considered an emergency contact by the schools). The children's safety should have been the primary consideration and for years the children have told CPS, teachers, counselors, coaches, and any adult who would listen about the abuse being perpetrated by their father, but no one would help them. Since this judge
has given custody of my children to their father, the children have been abused multiple times to the point where marks were left on them and they were placed into foster care in the neighboring state. The Florida judge who retains jurisdiction is still refusing to give me custody of the
children even though Federal and State laws mandate that the non-offending parent be given first consideration and custody once felony child abuse has been documented. I am being forced to jump through legal and social hoops with the Florida and Georgia Departments of Children and Families to try to gain custody of my children back. This is going on 6 months and my children
are still not in my custody. This is not deemed an emergency, so my children continue to suffer mentally, physically, and emotionally. They are being damaged by the very systems that are in place to protect them and itis forever changing who they are as individuals.
There are several of us here in Jacksonville that was done this way by the same Judge and this Judge had been demoted before coming onto the Family Court bench. He took my kids away and gave them to the abusive father after 8 years. One year after they were back with him it got so bad the Department of Family and Children took them away from him. Now I am going to court to try and get them back. Several professional have tried to help me and this Judge thinks he can do anything. It is so hard to explain this to my 13 year old twins and my 11 year old they don't understand why the Judge did this and will not listen to them.
Brookfield , Illinois
The abuse began again two years after my divorce, escalating from psychological and physical to the sexual abuse of my then, 7-year-old daughter (of which I was unaware). In January 2009 my then, 9-year-old daughter disclosed that her father had sexually abused her. Her symptoms were rectal bleeding, severe abdominal cramps, nausea, constipation, nightmares, depression, social and emotional detachment, suicidal ideations, the insistence that "something was in her privates", and more. My local police refused to take my child's statement and also contacted every county resource who should have protected her, thus, ensuring that no one would provide services. The Department of Family and Children's Services refused to investigate although the doctor made a report with the child protective agency. Her father filed for emergency custody, and the Guardian ad Litem (her attorney assigned by the Judge), filed a Petition for Order of Protection against me. Although the Order of Protection was denied by the Judge, its outrageous fabrications against me, as alleged by her attorney (such as my "genitalia obsession"), succeeded in destroying my credibility and rendering me "mentally ill and a danger to my children." Further, her attorney assured the Judge that several separate "thorough" investigations all determined her "sexual abuse allegation as unfounded". Her attorney also withheld crucial information from her father's former therapist, indicating that he needed to undergo sex offender testing to learn whether he posed a danger to children "before custody could be considered". The abuser was awarded permanent sole custody and I was given limited, supervised visitation. My daughter made a second sexual abuse disclosure in August 2009 to a doctor and nurse at a local hospital (to no avail). After what appears to be the first violent sexual assault occurring in January 2009, my child has continued to suffer once a month (for a period of 15 months now) from severe abdominal cramps, nausea, incontinence of her bowel and moderate-severe depression (she appears depressed most times we talk, via supervised telephone communication). Once a "gifted reader" and above average student, my daughter now struggles academically, and any progress is inconsistent, despite two tutoring interventions she receives. I have been denied visitation since December 2009.
I was 38 years old when I got pregnant, and gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. Her birth father, whom I never married, never stepped up to the plate of the responsibility for this child, even while I was pregnant. What he was capable of doing, was being violent, abusive, and controlling. When my daughter turned 5 yrs old, and he saw that I was actually doing well, in raising this beautiful child, without any help, or support from him, he talked to a fathers rights lawyer, and demanded custody. For the following 5 years, I fought, and I fought hard, in protecting my daughter, and in believing that I had rights. There is so much I can say, about the details concerning my case. Although it financially destroyed me, and emotionally drained me, and eventually took my daughter away from me, it will not stop me, from continuing the fight. After being the only parent that provided love, and security, warmth, home, family, friends, activities, religion, good schools, and a loving life, the only connection I have with my daughter, is supervised visitation ( which is extremely costly, and I have to pay!), and a supervised phone call (in which I have to pay for, and to be scheduled by "them"). It is not nearly enough, and definitely unfair and unjust!
I endured abuse for 8 years then left my ex after he attacked me and threw the two kids & I on the street to be homeless. After I left, my ex began to harass and stalk me. He threatened that if I do not do what he wanted, he would make up stories that I am crazy and take the children from me. He threatened that if he couldn't have the children he would put them in foster care.
My ex waged legal battle with me that continues to this day. I eventually lost all rights to my children, because I was falsely accused of "Parental Alienation Syndrome" and other false allegations. I was told that I am "painting a bad picture" of my ex when I talk about past abuse and voice concerns. I was criticized by Court personnel because I sought help from a Battered Women's shelter, and developed a safety plan.
Since being placed in dad's home, my son has tried to run away 4 times. My son has made at least a dozen allegations of abuse while in therapy, which have all been ignored. Both children also suffer from Anxiety and Post Traumatic Stress. I knew what it meant to be abused, I did not know what it meant to be battered until I entered the family court system.
I am originally from Russia , but now I am naturalized US citizen. I met my ex husband in Russia , lived there for a while, gave birth to 2 children, one in Russia , one in America. I filed for divorce in 2000 based on Domestic Violence committed by my ex- husband toward me and my children. He is sexual pervert, who tortured me, threatened me with a gun, slammed me, pushed me, cursed me. He abused our children as well. At first the father did not want anything to do with our kids. For 3 years I was going through Dutchess Family Court losing time with my children little by little. During the trial I had 12 neutral witnesses, father had none. I was pressured into joint custody by Law Guardian and the Judge, or I would "lose custody". One month later the father filed for sole custody and got it. I was ordered to go through supervised visitation 45 minutes every two weeks. The Law Guardian recommended custody to the father despite the testimony and facts of domestic violence and sexual abuse of the children by their father. That same day, that the father got custody he filed for child support; I have paid him over $107,000 to this day. This has been going on for seven years now. I don't have ANY contact with kids but paid huge amounts of money. I don't know how my children look like or sound like. I exposed the local Supervised Visitation program Director causing her to be persecuted and got her business closed for fraud and neglect on the job. She was indicted and spent time in jail. One day I objected in the court to Judge Amodeo's ruling to send my children to live in Texas, 2000 miles away and he put me in jail for 30 days for speaking out of turn. I was 7 months pregnant. The Judge was furious that I could not work--"Who is going to support the father?" he said.
When I got out of jail, I never saw my kids and had no contact. This was all about money. I became a cash cow for all of them. My kids became hostages. I haven't seen my children for 4.5 years.
Transcripts of proceedings were "erased" by the court. The abusive father was assigned a free attorney (I have records on him falsifying the bills to County on my case, and Judge Amodeo signing those illegal bills); I submitted them to DA, State Attorney, Inspector General, FBI - but no action was taken. Judge Amodeo prohibited me from giving anything to the Court evaluator, unless Judge had approved, this way many of my documents never had made it to her; Judge prohibited me from speaking to "anyone connected to the children' - for several months preceding trial. Judge Amodeo had stated that he does not care if I get my kids back on appeal, that either way is OK with him, since he had "gotten paid anyway, every week" (exact words).
I came to America with many high hopes, visions, dreams of American Freedom and liberties and have had many experiences which make me question the liberties and freedoms in America and in Dutchess County in New York State. My story combines human struggle with human and civil injustice, exorbitant and corrupt fees through a network of connected parties, with civil liberty violations and outright abuses of power. This all happened to me, a hardworking, honest, caring, outgoing mother of two children, a Russian native in this country who was not versed in the law or government or politics or "connections" in America, all while being an educated employee and Medal winner in track and field events in Dutchess County.
Canton, Ohio (Stark County)
On February 1, 2007, after several years of verbal and physical abuse, my oldest daughter and I turned in our abuser. Due to my ex-husband being a firefighter/EMT which is highly regarded in this community, we have been ignored and silenced many times. After only six months post his arrest on two counts of domestic violence, our Judge refused to listen to any of my witnesses testimonies and did not allow us to have a trial. On this day we were in court for his repeated and numerous child protective order violations and contempt of court. Instead, the judge took my youngest daughter and placed her in the home of her abuser "as my punishment for accusing a man of the community of such ridiculous things (the abuse)". Since 2007, I have hired several attorneys in hopes of getting help in getting my daughter home but we are repeatedly shut down by this judge and I cannot afford to go further. I have 3 teachers, 2 deputies, a private investigator and my children's testimonies of abuse as well as over 25 police reports of abuse. She tells the story many times of her father threatening to kill her and Mommy and Sissy. She cries when she visits every other weekend to "be home and safe where she gets love". My daughter's school has reported abuse to CPS several times and I have most recently been told by CPS that "they can't do anything with this judge in the way so they must close the case" and gave me a letter admitting she is at risk but the case is closed. I don't know if my little girl will ever come home or if anyone will ever care enough to help us. I worry every day that it may be the last day I hear from her or see her and the time they give him will only make him braver. I pray for her safe return home soon - before it is too late.
In 2006 my kids' father tried to strangle my 8-year-old while my 9-year-old son tried to stop him and got thrown into a wall. My daughter raced to phone, called me and I raced over got them called police. The police talked to my kids and believed them, but never arrested him. Child Protective Services got involved and said they were going to help. Unfortunately, they never helped any of us. I went to courts requesting protection, but the judge denied my request even though my ex has been arrested for harassment, stalking, and threats towards us. When I took my children back, my ex tried to attack my 8-year-old again. I jumped in front and he grabbed me by throat picked me up in the air, threw me on concrete, and proceeded to stomp on my face. The police saw this he was arrested. After one year of court and litigation, he walked away a free man. I have 130 police reports where I tried to protect my kids. My children disclosed the abuse to their therapist, and my ex has failed a drug test. There is nothing against me, yet I lost my kids to their abuser.
My case resulted from the local women's domestic violence shelter and an attorney on their list telling that I could obtain a protection from abuse order against my husband, who had broken my arm during a shoving match. They were completely wrong; the judge denied it, saying among other things, my 200 lb ex was "afraid" of 125 lb me and somehow that justified breaking my arm. Furthermore, neither the women's shelter nor the attorney told me that this county had a reputation for denying women protection orders for serious injuries, and I made a very uninformed decision that has wrecked my life. It seems like "insiders" know this, but they do not do anything about it or tell people like me, leading us to think that the laws work.
Using the local women's domestic violence resources continued to be a disaster; the attorney filed for custody and divorce and failed to obtain any interim physical custody for me. He completely refused to fight and get the interim order changed, instead saying his professional reputation was more "important." I thus had no custody of my then 12 and 15 year old children until almost a year later, after a custody trial. By then the ex had instilled so much hostility in the children that I obtained only six hrs/week average, with no vacation/holidays. I had used a second attorney, who also refused to fight the Order, and quit instead when I filed an appeal. The Order also directed a parent coordinator to get my custody increased. She did not get my custody increased, and instead cut off access to my son in Feb 2009 and I have not seen him since. No one in this county wants to deal with a man who wants the kids for the purposes of obtaining child support, the marital residence, other assets, and to continue abusing the wife who left him. No one wants to hold the first judge who denied the protection order accountable for his actions. The courts are not enforcing Orders and my ex is becoming more "enabled" as he continues to defy Orders to reunify the children with me, as counselors have said that there is no "substance" to their negativity towards me. I have another custody trial this month.
Tennessee law requires that a report of child sexual abuse be followed by a thorough team investigation.
My daughter was molested by her dad from age 2 but she received, instead, a thorough and systematic cover-up.
I can't boil the 11 years down to 20 sentences but here's a poignant segment. One day after a visit with dad, my daughter (age 3 ˝) told me that her dad penetrated her with a knife. I took her the hospital where she was separated from me and interviewed by an Our Kids Center social worker.
When they returned, the social worker admitted that my daughter recounted the knife incident. She followed with blaming me for pressuring her to make up stories about her dad. Her exam was "normal" and I was advised not to have her examined again. The social worker lied in her report stating that my daughter was not interviewed due to her age.
After her next dad visit, my daughter dripped blood-tinged urine on the toilet lid. She answered that her dad penetrated her with the knife again. In an attempt to get around the bias against me, I took her to an emergency room in another county where blood was found in her urine. The Department of Children's Services drew up a petition against me and I was investigated because I disobeyed the advice not to have her examined. During the investigation, I was never spoken to and nor was anyone who might support me.
In time, my daughter was removed from me and again without questioning me. My trying to protect her has been perverted into an attempt to brainwash her. This has supposedly caused her to be mentally ill, although her symptoms are suspiciously like those of sexual abuse.
I haven't seen my daughter in seven years and my parenting rights have been terminated.
I am a survivor of domestic violence, but I have yet to survive what is done to victims after they report. My home has been broken into several times and the only things missing were evidence against my abuser, proof of falsified police reports to protect my abuser and proof against both his attorney and the attorney that was supposed to be representing me. I have been the target of attempts on my life.
My son was shot and it was kept from me. My son got in trouble with the law, and it was kept from me. His court dates were kept from me as well. I have tapes that show the judge is biased, and when I asked for him to remove himself from the case, I suffered judicial retaliation. Court reporters were sent to empty courtrooms and I was forbidden to have them present by the judge. A Deputy Sheriff used intimidation against me. I have witnesses to everything that has happened, including eyewitnesses who have seen my ex on my property when break-ins occurred and during the night while I was sleeping at the other end of the house and death threats that were left on my desk. The police, courts and people connected with the courts are corrupt in Williamsburg. The only thing they are afraid of is investigation. Why won't you allow it to happen? Does the life of a victim of violence mean nothing more to you than the few bucks lawyers will make from the violence? I hope your daughters do not have to go through this, but the best thing is if they do, because maybe you will care than.
King County, Washington
I live in abject poverty, though I worked my way through college, tested out of a post-college program and toured Europe playing the violin for a time as a child on scholarship. I have not seen one of my children in nine years. My other child was bribed with a Mercedes-Benz less than a year ago when he experimented with drugs. He hit me in the face to get what he wants on two documented occasions: He learned that if you hit a woman and get the family court involved, you are rewarded with a "chick magnet". Though I am indigent and have endured protracted litigation for nearly 16 years, I finally succumb to complacency with unwarranted sanctions over my head. After I was beaten, threatened and shot at by my former husband, the court flipped the onus onto me. I pay child support to a man, who on his own sworn statement, makes $80,000 per month (not per year). I now live in a roach-infested public housing building in the Washington State Address Confidentiality Program. The court can put me on the street without good cause, with no due process, with no findings of facts and with no conclusions of law. No proper investigation was ever conducted by any police department or Child Protective Services. My son has attempted to contact me on three occasions within less than a year's time and I cannot speak to him pursuant to an unfounded court order.
I live in this protection program for a good reason, but the King County Superior Court has sealed my files, then apparently unsealed only certain documents after orders were entered against me, publicly impugning my character. In my case not only has the original abuser, my former husband, been rewarded by family court for his unscrupulous actions, our children have been groomed to vilify me in order to be rewarded financially and otherwise. The court failed my children and has not only re-victimized me over and over throughout the years from 1994, but it has disconnected my beloved children from my extended family. My older child did not know his grandfather -- a man, against all odds, survived growing up in an orphanage in St. Louis. He passed away 4 days after I saw my youngest child last on June 10, 2009.
Port Orchard, Washington
I left my 14-year marriage after increasing psychological and emotional abuse and the constant threat of physical abuse by my alcoholic husband. My three young children were suffering severe emotional and physical trauma during subsequent visitation. When my ex-husband was arrested for domestic violence against his then girlfriend, and the reported rape by him of a single mother who lived in an apartment above his, as well as a third DUI, I sought protection from the court as I had watched my children deteriorate due to continued abuse and fear for their physical safety. I was warned by my attorney that if I proceeded I would likely be viewed as an "emotional, enmeshed, alienating" mother, but I feared for the lives and well being of my children. His warnings proved true. Once in the family court system in Kitsap County and despite their reported fears, my children were viewed as the ones who needed "fixing" because they didn't love their father enough. They were forced by a court-appointed counselor into a "total immersion" approach of therapy in which they were forced to spend more and more time with their father. Initial court-ordered evaluations found my ex to be severely addicted to alcohol (he had been in treatment twice before) and that his parenting skills were lacking. The court ordered parental counseling, alcohol treatment and a psychological evaluation for my ex, and the alcohol evaluator reported that he should not have the children on overnight visits until he had demonstrated six months of sobriety. All of this information was subsequently ignored by the court and for three years he was allowed to abuse us through the system by making false allegations and attacking me and the children in retribution for seeking protection. My children declined to an alarming degree. My 6-year old daughter would vomit, and my two pre-teenage sons developed suicidal ideations in response to the counseling and visitation. In those three years my ex never had the mandated psychological evaluation, nor the alcohol treatment and went only to one counseling appointment but the guardian ad litem supported his non-compliance. In contrast, the children and I were ordered to attend separate weekly counseling sessions (which we did faithfully) and I was ordered to have a psych evaluation at the request of my ex-husband (which I did and was found to be a highly competent parent and that I should retain custody of my children). The court-appointed counselor for my children negated and ignored my children's fears of their father and filed false reports to the judge. The guardian ad litem also mocked the fears and reports of the children and admitted in court that he wasn't reading the legal paperwork, but complained that the case was taking too long and that he needed more money, which the judge granted. My children were told by the counselor that I would go to jail if they didn't stop fighting the visitation, and my ex was nearly successful in taking the kids away from me for being an "alienator." Ultimately, after three years, my ex was finally faced with jail time due to his complete lack of compliance and so in an unexpected moment in the courtroom he capitulated and relinquished his legal rights to the kids, but the judge admonished me to still have the children see their father. Today, my children are free from his abusive presence and are thriving academically, socially and emotionally. The financial devastation of that time will likely ultimately cause me to sell the family home this year. The scars remain, and I live daily with the knowledge that like most of the women in my situation, I came a hair's breadth from losing my children forever.
Undisclosed City, State
Our son was born in 2001. At age 1˝, his father brings him home from visit at paternal grandparents home (where his elder sister resides). My son was crying due to his painfully red and swollen genitals. Paternal family feigned ignorance about how injury occurred. Soon after, in the presence of guests, father flies into a rage, cocks fist at mother shouting, "Come here, I'll punch your f-cking teeth out." My son witnessed the outburst.
At 2 ˝, my son reveals that he was sexually molested. While being read to, Holden climbed onto mother's head, pressed his diaper into her face and said, "Suck my cock, Mommy. Mommy, suck my cock." Mom first believed it to be my husband's elder sister who was documented as a sex offender by the Department of Social Services. However, my husband's first wife's mother told me that my husband's whole family is involved in incest and advises getting a restraining order as her daughter did. On legal advice, his first wife did not report the abuse of her girls.
In 2004 I reported my son's statements to the state police in Russell, Massachusetts. The trooper said, "These things are very hard to prove." He was mandated to report it to the Department of Social Services. He said that it was up to DSS to forward it to the District Attorney, and they refused. Rather than investigate incest by father's family, DSS charges mom with 'neglect' for continuing to live with father, and for son's 2 yr old immunizations being late. My son and I sought protection in a local domestic violence shelter. My ex agreed to supervised visits with his son. Shortly after, my ex got court ordered overnight visits with our son. His disclosures escalate, with increased aberrant sexual behaviors. Holden masturbated on furniture, with his teddy bear, and on people. He continued to disclose what Daddy, his aunt, and his half-sister did to him. Sobbing, he begged and pleaded not to be made to go to see Daddy. Grandma tape-recorded his pleas. My son's disclosures and injuries are documented by his pediatrician, a forensic investigator, a child therapist, his maternal grandmother, and a friend of the family, a school nurse, his daycare provider, and his Mom. Injuries to his genitals were recorded three times by his pediatrician. I kept a log of his disclosures. They number over 150 incidents and were submitted as evidence to the court. He said, "Daddy licks my butt." "she puts sweet stuff on her pee-pee, I lick it." "he sticks blocks up my butt. she thinks it feels good. It does NOT feel good!" "No! No, not my backdoor...Not me!" -waking from sleep in terror, and "he won't swallow, I swallow."
In 2005, the Judge gives Perpetrator full physical and legal custody. On Dec 27, State police entered our home through unlocked cellar door accompanied by perpetrator and court order. My son is taken. I am labeled as "coacher", "alienator" and slapped with loss of custody, child support, no contact with my son for 18 days, supervised visitation for 4 hours at $300 per week with a court mandated agency. I was ordered to undergo a psychological evaluation with a court chosen psychologist.
Judge continually denied motions for unsupervised visits and was subsequently removed from the bench on Sep 1, 2006 for her unethical behavior in this case, after letters to the Commission on Judicial Conduct in Boston.
In 2006, when money ran out at the $3000 mark for Supervised Visitation, my son and I were separated for 6 months with no contact.
In 2006 - 2008, Judge Sacks continues legacy of denied motions for unsupervised visits. Appeals court affirms Judge Lyon's decree in retaliation for her removal. YWCA personnel suppress more of son's disclosures by reporting them to the perps and falsify the records of his disclosures. Supervisor of visitation chastised mother for reading a note from my mom reading, "Grandma and Grandpa love and miss you and hope to see you soon." Supervisor sends a lying letter against me to her friend, the Chief of Probation, and suspends my next visit with my son. This was done in retaliation for a letter of complaint against the Chief of Probation. I determined not to allow further lies about me or suppression of son's disclosures and remove myself from Supervision Prison.
2010 - My son has led a motherless existence as the object of his father and aunt's unbridled lust for the past 4 ˝ years. He is now over 8 ˝ years old. He has not seen Mommy since August 16, 2008.
In North America incest is not taboo, just talking about it is.
Undisclosed City, State
When my son was almost 14 I went to court and in a declaration disclosed the abuse that my son and I suffered from his father. I told them that I was allowed to have one dress, one pair of panties, one pair of shoes and no brassier and I was not allowed to drive. My son and I were both punished by not being allowed to eat. When angry he would make our son do pushups or run until he threw up. Minor's Attorney read the declaration and stated that he had never read anything so "vitriolic" in his life and I must be mentally ill. My court-ordered Psych Evaluation came back stating that I was sound of mind and above average intelligence. Within 24 hours the Minor's Attorney submitted a 22-page rebuttal stating why he felt I was mentally ill. Minor's Attorney had never taken the time to interview me nor does he possess a Degree in Psychology. The judge thanked him for his guidance and gave custody of our son to his physical and emotional abuser. My son has not lived with me for two and a half years and has flunked out of school. His father was court ordered to have our child in therapy twice a month but he has neglected to do so. My son has lost hope for his future and lost faith in the system that was supposed to protect him.
Undisclosed City, State
I fled the state with my children after family services was no help at all in protecting my daughter from abuse and my son from neglect, the final straw being that my daughter told me her father was molesting her with his fingers.
I was hunted down like a dog, complete with lies aired on America's Most Wanted, right along with the serial killers and rapists.
I was arrested, went through criminal proceedings, and have had no contact with my children for 2 years.
Case Study Review
From the above sample of cases, a pattern is evident:
- A young child discloses sexual and/or physical abuse by the father to a variety of professionals and community members.
- The abuse is corroborated by medical and/or psychological factors.
- Many of the children receive Victims of Crime funding for therapy
- The mother may have been battered by the father.
- The police do not arrest and the District Attorney does not prosecute the accused offender.
- CPS does not investigate incest cases thoroughly.
- CPS does not protect the children, even after multiple reports.
- The accused offender files for custody of his alleged victim.
- Professionals are appointed by the family law court. These professionals often take on multiple roles in cases. All enjoy a high standard of living because of the litigation.
- Certain individuals are repeatedly appointed.
- Many of the professionals fail to make mandated suspected child abuse reports, even when the child directly discloses abuse to them.
- The court-appointed custody evaluator ignores or minimizes domestic violence and child abuse, and recommends the child be placed with the identified abuser.
- The court-appointed attorney for the child does not represent his/her client's wishes regarding placement, and often functions as a de facto attorney for the accused perpetrator.
- Special Masters, mental health professionals with powers of a judge, are untrained in the law, yet are given authority to make binding orders on cases.
- Evidence of abuse and witnesses for the child are not admitted into the family law court.
- The child is not allowed to speak to the judge, or his/her wishes are ignored by the court.
- The mother who is trying to protect the child, is accused of alienating the child from the father.
- After months or years of litigation, the mother becomes bankrupt and must represent herself.
- The child is placed in the unsupervised or full custody of the identified perpetrator.
- The protective mother is placed on supervised visitation or not allowed contact with the child
- The child pleads to remain with the safe parent, but is taken, sometimes by police force, back to the identified abuser.
Child Abuse: Educator's Responsibility
Crime and Violence Prevention Center
California Attorney General's Office
Bill Lockyer, Attorney General
INDICATORS OF SEXUAL ABUSE
Indicators of sexual abuse can surface through a child's history, physical symptoms and behavior. Some of these indicators, taken separately, may not be symptomatic of sexual abuse. They are listed below as a guide and should be examined in the context of other factors.
- The single most important indicator is disclosure by the child to a friend, classmate, teacher, friend's mother or other trusted adult. The disclosure may be direct or indirect, e.g., "I know someone…" or "What would you do if…?" or "I heard something about somebody…" It is not uncommon for the disclosure by children experiencing chronic or acute sexual abuse to be delayed. Children rarely fabricate these accounts; they should be taken seriously.
- The child wears torn, stained, or bloody underclothing.
- Knowledge that a child's injury/disease (vaginal, trauma, sexually transmitted disease) is unusual for the specific age group.
- Knowledge of a child's history of previous or recurrent injuries/diseases.
- Unexplained injuries/diseases (parent/caretaker unable to explain reason for injury/disease); there are discrepancies in explanation; blame is placed on a third party; explanations are inconsistent with medical diagnosis.
- A young girl is pregnant or has a sexually transmitted disease. Pregnancy of a minor does not, in and of itself, constitute the basis of reasonable suspicion of sexual abuse.
Sexual Behaviors of Children
- Sexually transmitted disease.
- Genital discharge or infection.
- Physical trauma or irritation to the anal/genital area (pain, itching, swelling, bruising, bleeding, lacerations, abrasions), especially if injuries are unexplained or there is an inconsistent explanation.
- Pain during urination or defecation.
- Difficulty in walking or sitting due to genital or anal pain.
- Psychosomatic symptoms (stomachaches, headaches).
Behavioral Indicators in Younger Children
- Detailed and age-inappropriate understanding of sexual behavior (especially by younger children).
- Inappropriate, unusual or aggressive sexual behavior with peers or toys.
- Compulsive indiscreet masturbation.
- Excessive curiosity about sexual matters or genitalia (self and others).
- Unusually seductive with classmates, teachers and other adults.
- Excessive concern about homosexual, especially of boys.
Behavioral Indicators in Older Children & Adolescents
- Enuresis (wetting pants, bed wetting).
- Fecal soiling.
- Eating disturbances such as overeating, undereating.
- Fears and phobias.
- Overly compulsive behavior.
- School problems or significant change in school performance (attitude and grades).
- Age-inappropriate behavior that includes pseudomaturity or regressive behavior such as bed wetting or thumb sucking.
- Inability to concentrate.
- Sleeping disturbances (nightmares, fear of falling asleep, fretful sleep pattern, sleeping long hours).
- Drastic behavior changes.
- Speech disorders.
- Frightened of parents/caretaker or of going home.
Sexual abuse of children within the family, or incest, is the most hidden form of child abuse. In spite of its taboo and the difficulty of detection, some researchers believe it may be even more common than physical abuse. In discussing sexual abuse, incest means sexual activity between certain close relatives, (e.g., parents and children, sibling, grandparents and grandchildren); intrafamilial mean sexual activity between persons in a family setting, (e.g., stepparent, parent's live-in partner).
- Chronic fatigue.
- Clinical depression, apathy.
- Overly compliant behavior.
- Poor hygiene or excessive bathing.
- Poor peer relations and social skills; inability to make friends.
- Acting out, running away, aggressive, antisocial or delinquent behavior.
- Alcohol or drug abuse.
- Prostitution or excessive promiscuity.
- School problems, frequent absences, sudden drop in school performance.
- Refusal to dress for physical education.
- Non-participation in sports and social activities.
- Fearful of other things (going outside or participating in familiar activities).
- Extraordinary fear of males (in cases of male perpetrator and female victim).
- Self-consciousness of body beyond that expected for age.
- Sudden acquisition of money, new clothes or gifts with no reasonable explanation.
- Suicide attempt or other self-destructive behavior.
- Crying without provocation.
- Setting fires.
In most reported cases, the father or a male caretaker is the initiator and the victim is usually a female child. However, boys are also victims more often that previously believed. Embarrassment and shame often deter children from reporting abuse. The initial sexual abuse may occur at any age from infancy through adolescence.